Book 12
My Summary: Oddy is dumb and a bunch of men die. Syrens, Charybdis, Scylla, and Helios' Cattle.
I think this is the first time I call him Oddy.
Odysseus is still in his dumbasshole phase here. He takes the men to feast and hang out with Circe. At least it's only for a day this time. She gives them advice on how to avoid dangers on the way home. Syrens (will sing so beautifully you crash your ship and they'll eat you, have the men plug their ears and tie you to the mast so you can listen), Scylla (hydra/giant squid thing will snatch your men in its tentacles on the way through, just go as quick as you can), and Charybdis (a whirlpool monster, avoid it in favor of Scylla since it'll take a whole ship at a time).
Odysseus asks if he can fight them, or otherwise get through without losing men. Circe responds, "Must you have battle in your heart forever?" Which is a great line. Also, don't eat Helios' livestock.
The crew avoids the Syrens without too much fuss. Odysseus is tied to the mast and yells for them to free him when he hears the song (written in sets of four lines, six syllables, ABAB rhyme), but he's kept in place and they get through fine.
They're trying to sail between Scylla and Charybdis now, and, "Kirke's bidding against arms had slipped my mind," and he grabs weapons and armor. You had to remember five things!
1. Tie self to mast.
2. Wax in men's ears.
3. Sail quickly by Scylla
4. Avoid Charybdis.
5. No eating the livestock.
FIVE THINGS! For a guy who gets an epithet about being a genius every five pages, Odysseus is a dumbass. Despite this, he only loses six men (one for each mouth, apparently), thus not really facing any consequences for his idiocy. I've read some interpretations that say the entire journey segment (being told by Odysseus, rather than narrated directly by Homer/the speaker) is all bullshit. Does that mean he did something even dumber and this is an awkward attempt to cover it up? (I don't really hold a high opinion of this theory. Odysseus doesn't make himself look great in the telling, and doesn't have much reason to lie. He's well respected anyway.)
They head to Helios' island next, and Eurylochus riles up the crew again. Trapped by storms and in danger of starving, he convinces the men to kill some of the cattle. He does sacrifice some to the gods, making him not a total dumbass. "Better/ open your lungsto a big sea once for all/ than to waste to skin and bones on a lonely island," he says. They kill some kine (kine means a group of cattle. It's so out of use that Blogger spellcheck puts the red squiggly under it.)
Helios calls to Zeus to avenge his cows, Zeus complies. He ends the storms trapping them on the island, lets them leave, and blasts their ship with a lightning bolt. Everyone dies, but Zeus protects Odysseus as he sneaks past Scylla. This leads to him making his way (floating on wreckage for a week and a half) to Calypso, where he is at the beginning of the story.
I'd almost be willing to forgive him if he'd chosen to stay with her after all that, as opposed to hanging out with Circe.
Maybe everyone dying is what makes him less of a dumbasshole.
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