Bonus:
Socrates would hit the dog.
Summary: Bad arguments; written badly
Commentary:
I admit the appearance of inconsistency in what I am saying; but there may not be any real inconsistency after all. There is a doctrine whispered in secret that man is a prisoner who has no right to open the door and run away; this is a great mystery which I do not quite understand. Yet I too believe that the gods are our guardians, and that we are a possession of theirs. Do you not agree?
Yes, I quite agree, said Cebes.
And if one of your own possessions, an ox or an ass, for example, took the liberty of putting himself out of the way when you had given no intimation of your wish that he should die, would you not be angry with him, and would you not punish him if you could?
Certainly, replied Cebes.
As someone who had a cat run away, I can assure you that the first thing I would do if I found him would not be punish him. Some people would argue that this is intentionally flawed logic, or maybe some kind of satire/irony. I feel like if you construct Socrates as the uber-philosopher and then make him sound like an idiot it's shit writing.
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